Game: Crask
Area: Crask Weyr
Position: Rider, dragonhealer
Wing: Razorrip Wing
On-Site Profile: profile
Dragon: Green Sereth
Flits: Green Joga, Bronze Merit
Local Species:
Pets:
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Table of Contents
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Consise/Basics
Name: Loti
Nickname:
Position: Rider, dragonhealer
Past Ranks: healerbrat, candidate, weyrling, rider
Wing: Razorrip
Former Wing:
Gender: Female
Sexuality*: Pansexual
- Note that all sexualities are fluid or basically pansexual, due to ness's own sexual mindset. All characters are at base pansexual; they could go for anyone based on personality over gender. Some of them may lean, and have a gender preference. Some may be more bisexual. Bigenders, transgenders, and other genders may not be an issue on pern, so that aspect may not be an issue. Point: Personality over sexuality, which is why they will be listed as Pansexual with a potential lean.
Looks
Loti is bony and thin. She is most certainly not conventionally pretty. She gives the impression of being taller then she is, because her features are so long, but really she's only about 5'5"— small end of average for a pernese woman. Her eyes are gray, and set in a pale-tan face. Her hair is black, and glossy. She takes good care of it and leaves it long: basically her only mark of vanity. Frequently it's tied back out of the way, but she'll wear it loose when she can. Her limbs and her face are all long and horselike; her movements in youth were awkward, but as she ages she'll learn to move with such lanky limbs, and become slowly more graceful. She is fond of strangely colorful and flowing clothing, wearing skirts and scarves when possible- it's the closest she comes to gaudy. She also likes jewelry and bangles, and shiny bits of metal. That said, she is both practical and a rider, so she can't afford much in the way of jewelry, and will wear practical clothing more frequently because she is a working woman.
Personality
Loti is a creature marked from past experience, not all of which has been entirely welcoming or good, on top of a natural case of nerves.
Skittish and wary, it can be hard to get to know Loti. She's leery of strangers, and she's prone to being nervous in general. She's jumpy: fast movements, unexpected things, loud noises— all of those will cause her to twitch and shift her attention. She is also fairly quiet, and unless they get her in a situation where she is actually in charge or doing something, she might be hard to remember, except perhaps as having her eyes open a touch wider then normal.
She's not a very social creature. It's hard for her to get comfortable in general- around specific people or in crowds. The more people there is, the more uncomfortable she is. Large, crowded social events- like gathers and feasts- are her nightmare. She's the sort to do well in small groups of close friends, and even then she'll be uneasy for a few moments— this is, of course, after those friends have gone through the long process of earning her trust.
That isn't to say that she has no social urge; she is human and she likes the company of other humans. It's just that her nerves about people get in the way of that sort of regular closeness.
Let it not be said that Loti is not a willful creature, for she most certainly is. Stubborn as hell, she perseveres. That nervousness she maintains manifests primarily in a constant wariness of people. It has several layers: she may be cool with you eventually, on a casual level, but she has successive walls and barriers the closer you try to get. It also manifests in hyper-vigilance. Loti constantly seems on watch-dog mode, keeping her eyes peeled for the next potential threat; the result is that she rarely relaxes, and is prone to a constant level of high stress. It's probably unhealthy, but she's used to it.
Given that, she seems to have chosen well in terms of career and/or vocation: Loti is a healer, and if there was ever a job where dealing with stress is a constant, it is healing. Even now, post-impression, healing will not be something she gives up, even if she doesn't do it as a profession anymore. For all her nervousness and distrust of people, taking care of people is an irremovable part of who and what she is.
Though she is caring, Loti does not suffer fools. She is no nonsense. She isn't malicious, but she'll be blunt, if the situation calls for it, and her tongue can be sharp. Goofing off in her presence will earn her a scowl, and if it puts people in danger it'll earn a vicious berating. She unconsciously puts the well being of others in front of herself. Even something like avoiding treatment because of fear will earn a tonguelashing, but one that's much more gentler then one brought upon by negligence.
Needless to say, as a healer, Loti is smart. Part of her quietness comes from a natural sense of observation: she's always watching, always wary, always paying attention. As a result, she notices things. Those things she keeps with her, for when she might need to use them later. She's quick to make connections and very sharp and shrewd in terms of smarts. She's also studious- need to be when you're a healer. It took awhile to learn, but she knows how to study academically. She is driven partially by logic, and she does try to think things through logically before making major decisions, even when her emotions are weighing heavily in on the subject. She knows she's not infallible.
That said, she isn't a creature composed only of logic. While she thinks through things logically, she'll still go with her gut feeling or her emotions 70% of the time. She's surprisingly intuitive, especially about people: the feelings she gets about people are frequently accurate. Given how closed she is about people and about expressing emotion, she's surprisingly empathetic. Perhaps that's why she's so drawn to healing; she knows when people are hurting, and it makes her feel sympathetically aweful.
Loti feels, and she feels quite keenly. She is not, however, always good at showing it. She's trained herself to hide emotion quite well, hiding behind a constantly wary-nervous-frowning version of a pokerface. She seems very serious, most of the time— and though she is a serious person, that's not all she is, contrary to what it sometimes would appear.
Both diligent and dedicated, Loti sometimes gets a touch ahead of herself. She'll get distracted by situations, sometimes forgetting to sleep and eat— and sometimes forgoing them entirely, without the forgetting. Though she's not too big on the showing emotion externally, her deeply-felt emotions will manifest themselves in other ways. Nervous, upset, unhappy? She'll frequently avoid eating or sleeping, plagued by nightmares or unable to enjoy the food. This is true of when the feelings originate in her own situations or mal-events— but it's almost more common for it to happen out of empathy. If she's been working too long in the infirmary, exposed to suffering without a mental health break, she'll start to get a touch morbid and upset. She frequently won't notice it happening, because it creeps up on her, in that situation. It may also come from assisting in emergency situations, or if someone she's close to is hurting. She's not really prone to depression, but situational anhedonia is not unheard of.
Loti isn't much of a leader. It isn't that she can't be one— she's been known to take charge of situations, but usually minor ones in which she has a comfortable knowledge: in healing, for instance. She's not even bad at it. However, in most instances? she'll avoid it. She doesn't really like dealing with people too much, especially not in the capacity of a leader. She wouldn't step up to be a leader voluntarily, and she'd avoid situations where it might become an option.
Loti is a fairly private person. She likes to have her own comfort space. She doesn't really like to be touched— she has a bubble, so to speak. Touching her unbidden will provoke an almost-flinch and an odd expression. If she DOES touch you, it's a sign of how much she trusts you. She also needs her alone-time, and mental health time.. if she doesn't get it, as mentioned above, she gets morbid and unhappy. She also strongly respects privacy and personal space. She needs her own area, and the fact that her weyrhut is hers is significant. In candidacy and weyrlinghood, she would've maintained the borders of her cot-area like a hawk. She might not snap, if they were breached— she's not that rude— but she'd've become visibly upset. That still maintains. Her work-areas, her home-areas— they're hers. Don't mess with them. She also doesn't like to be asked for information she doesn't give freely.
To a certain few, Loti is deadly loyal. to the rest of people, she is primarily distant and wary. She avoids making long-term connections, both to people and places. Such things make her vulnerable, and she avoids vulnerability. She's used to the odds being stacked somewhat against her favor.
After her initial nervousness, you might be able to call Loti brave- if you were willing to stretch the word a little. She certainly isn't the sort to run away; she's nervous, yes, and she's wary, and she's likely to avoid a situation that might be dangerous.. but she's not a coward. She's far from being a coward. She's actually quite good at keeping her head in a crisis— after all, she's a healer. It doesn't matter how freaking terrified you are, if someone comes in who's bleeding out, you have to do what you need to.
Loti makes a good teacher, and should she ever assume the role of one, she will find that she enjoys it much more then she otherwise might think she did. In general, she is patient when she needs to be, and that helps her when she's in a teaching role: if someone just isn't getting it, she'll work with them. Teaching is really one of the only things that might be considered social which she does with any kind of comfort at all.
Loti is not terribly familial. Even if she breeds, she won't really be that close to her children— it will always be kind of weird to her, and her love of personal space will inhibit some serious bonding. She's more likely to have a quiet, occasionally awkward relationship with her children, where more is unspoken, however much trouble that may or may not cause. She is likely to afford them with some degree of freedom, trusting their judgement once they reach an age she considers 'reasonable', and she will prefer to treat them as minor adults. After all, she herself has always been very independent and self-reliant… it may not occur to her that her kin might not be the same way, as counter-intuitive as that may be. The only person she might ever be actually close to, besides her dragon, is a lover or a very very close friend, and even that is a very very hard Maybe area. It's also hard to win her specific loyalty.. being a fellow human being is enough to get some basic loyalties out of her, but more then that is really an uphill trek.
Loti has a subtle sort of charisma that is probably only going to be noticed by a few, oddly-perceptive people. Some people find her strangely alluring, though the commonality between those people is unknown. Perhaps some people are just comforted by her watchdoggyness? Who knows. Regardless, some people just react well to her, despite humans' natural inclination to be uncomfortable around that which seems nervous.
Loti is slightly bitter. She has a whole pile o' baggage that she never, ever comes close to talking about. She likes it that way. She is, at least, strong enough to bear it, even if it makes her slightly twitchy.
She is— or can be, rather— both gentle and nurturing, but the only people likely to feel these obviously are her pets and her dragon.
History
Loti's life started simply enough. she was born into the healer hall, and always was a shy girl. She stayed there for many a year, and expected to stay there her whole life. She helped her parents where she could, and took to healing quite naturally, even if she was rather shy. She became an apprentice as soon as they would let her, and excelled quickly: she had hte benefit of being surrounded by the craft her whole life.
She was a senior apprentice at the age of 16. Searchriders from Crask came to visit the hall and hte hold to which it was attached, and she was in the right place at hte right time. A green picked her out as a decent candidate, and- nervous though she was- she agreed, because it was the duty of a good pernese to stand a as a candidate when a dragon selected you for a candidate.
She managed to Impress Sereth that year, and was thrown into a world chaotic and new and unfriendly to her. It was stressful, particularly with her shyness— her saving grace was hte dragon she Impressed understood her reclusiveness, and shared some of the tendencies.
She graduated weyrlinghood without many faux pas, and turned her studies towards dragonhealing, as soon as she was able: she never intended to stop being useful to her people with her craft, even if she was a dragonrider now. She also took up a relationship with rider N'tel, which has lasted.
Both she and N'tel have children. Though their fathers differ, Loti does care deeply for them— even if she doesn't really understand kids nor know how to act around them. They make her nervous, both her own children and N'tel's, and though her eldest is 15, she's still nervous and awkward around them. She does care for them all very deeply, though, and she's proud of them too: especially that Kivoran and Telnorra are standing.
The recent plagues have also taken a toll: N'tel and Loti both were fine, but Loti assisted and was helpless when the plague began to sweep through the weyr, unable to keep people alive or healthy. To make matters worse, she became pregnant- an emotional mountain in it's own right for several reasons- two turns ago, as the Plague was raging on. N'tel's second- youngest died of it shortly before her own daughter was born, and said daughter didn't last a few days before succumbing as well to the plague. Loti was left rather shell-shocked, and though she's healed some of her emotional wounds from all of the losses, others still remain as fresh as they were, dulled only slightly by time.
Family
| Name | Relation | Location | Position | Dragon | PC/NPC/Adoptable? |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| N'tel | Weyrmate | Crask | Dragonrider | Blue Larrzeith | PC |
| N'val | N'tel's Son | Crask | Dragonrider | Brown Jiavth | ? |
| Telnorra | Daughter | Crask | candidate | - | PC |
| Kivoran | N'tel's Son | Crask | Candidate | - | PC |
| Lorel | N'tel's daughter | - | Deceased | - | - |
| Natai | Loti's Daughter | - | Deceased | - | - |
Dragon
Sereth
This female is on the midsize scale for a green, she is amazingly average sized. She is still skinny and lithe, this lovely girl is a pale cool green color for most of her hide. Then along her face, hands and tail she has a pale lightish bluegreen color. She carries herself with a regal bearing but she is also sure of her walk not nervous or scared at all.
Firelizards
Joga
Green F Firelizard
Small, light in build, fragile in appearance if not in actions
Merit
Bronze M Firelizard
Big and well built.
Pets
Home
Active threads
Past Threads
OOC/Reference
An:
Es:
Theme:
Started as: Rider
Starting Age: 31
Starting Date IC/OOC: Spring 3012 11th pass / 9-10-11
Bdate if specified: /
